Thankful

Chunkin' up!

Toes up by his head! Wish I could flex like that!

Sweet little brother!

Today's ultrasound appointment was sweet. Basically, it was just a growth check (don't get me started on how dumb I think that is) and he is currently measuring 61st percentile. Pretty normal. I expect that to go up the further along we get, but I'll take it for now! Everything else looked great. I was able to see him yawn a couple of times and stretch like crazy. So cute! My heart is full and I am very thankful.

Summer Days

Hard to get motivated to do much lately. The days are just so long and so HOT! Doing anything outside is just plain miserable and cabin fever is definitely setting in. The girls are down for a nap right now, but I bet any moment Noa will burst out of her room and tell me she's not tired. Then she'll sit and talk to me for the next hour and a half. Loudly. I'm amazed at how kids just have no volume control at all. *sigh* That's just how it has been going lately. I'm getting more exhausted as my belly gets bigger. Back is hurting a lot. I've only gained 10 pounds so far (found that out on Monday - this is good!), but somehow pregnancy just rearranges everything and makes it feel like 50 pounds! Blaaah! Not to mention I'm dead set against buying any more maternity clothes, so I'm just lookin' nasty lately. Everything is all worn out and faded and not stylish in the least. I don't really care though. Right now I'm sitting here in my pj's and eating cherry pie. I keep telling myself, "3 more months. 3 more months." Then I can burn all my maternity madness and get back to looking normal! Maybe I will invite you all to the bonfire! Why didn't anyone tell me that having 4 kids in 4 years was kind of crazy? Oh well. I love them. Even if I don't get a nap anymore. ;)

Here's a few (very few) pics from this week. Yesterday we went to Publix early in the morning and it was great. Not busy at all! And not as hot. But we had to kill some time before the reptile show started at the library. Worst show ever. I was thinking it was going to be like the zoo, where you could just walk around and look at the reptiles. Nope. The reptile guy was really into educating us about everything before he took one little turtle out to show us. Nice idea, but in a room full of about 70 toddlers, it's just not the best plan. It was even boring for me! Needless to say, my kids were all over the place. Everyone else's kids were fidgety but still sitting on their laps. Not Lydia. Not Ruthie. Noa was great, but I was chasing the other two the whole time. We left early. :)

But anyway, back to killing time. We decided to eat a 2nd breakfast at Chick-fil-a. No kids were there, so the girls had the play area all to themselves! Awesome! (Sorry I made that seem like it was more of a story than what it actually was. Bottom line: we went to Publix, then Chick-fil-a, then the library.)

Then this morning we stayed home. I had laundry, dishes, and vacuuming to do. My poor back!!! But, I'm sitting here because it is all done! The girls wanted braids today (very surprising), so here's some shots of the braids.

So happy to have braids!!!!!!!! Even if I have green smoothie all over my dress!!!!

This picture was the 17th attempt to get a better picture after telling them what a real smile looks like. Obviously we are smile challenged!

Computer Glitches

The strangest thing happened the other night. Russ had forwarded me an article entitled, "What if I had stayed in the workforce?" written by a stay-at-home-mom. It was an interesting article, for sure, but since my time in the workforce was brief and random at best, I've never struggled with the issue of staying home to raise my kids. The crux of the article, though, wasn't necessarily about that, but rather finding your worth in the Lord. Not in the work place. Not in motherhood. Not in anything or anyone but Christ. And this, of course, is a message we all need to hear repeatedly. Midway through this tiny post, she started a new paragraph with these words:

There is no better path to discouragement than to look within ourselves. Instead we are to look to our Savior.

I read the next two sentences. They were the same. Followed by more of the same. Again and again, those two lines repeated themselves. I called Russ over to see if this was how the article read. At first he didn't even notice what the problem was, but then he assured me that his didn't do that. Some kind of computer glitch had printed those lines over and over again, and when I tried to scroll down to get to the end of the post (which was only about 10 more lines), I couldn't even get to it because these two lines just kept appearing and pushing everything else further down.

There is no better path to discouragement than to look within ourselves. Instead we are to look to our Savior.

This came to mind today as I was driving to Costco with all three girls in tow. I was tearing up just thinking about never having any time to myself and how I have to take the girls everywhere with me. I was thinking about how I would have to load and unload them, fit all of our goods in the cart with all of them crammed in it and somehow keep them from opening each box, cracking the eggs, and fighting over the snacks. I remembered how messy the churros were last time and thought about not getting each girl one, but then wondered how I would even get around the store without some kind of distraction for them. The cart is heavy to push. I am 6 months pregnant. My back hurts. I am out of breath even before I start shopping. I get weird stares from people. There's really nothing about the shopping trip that excites me. I mean, its a warehouse for crying out loud! And an under-air-conditioned one at that! Some days I even get frustrated with poor Russ thinking to myself, 'sure he has to work all day, but I work all day too and I have 3 kids to tend to while doing it. He's not pregnant. He's not lugging three kids around while trying to shop.' On and on and ON! So yeah. I was going down that road this morning and then I remembered the two, never ending sentences from the article.

There is no better path to discouragement than to look within ourselves. Instead we are to look to our Savior.

Thankfully, I had filed that thought away, thinking that maybe the Lord was speaking to me. I started to pray. Just little short prayers, pouring my frustrations out to the Lord. It was a wonderful 15 minute car ride. Miraculously, the girls didn't call my name once and I just talked to my Savior the whole way. And yes, we ended up having a pretty smooth trip, but that's not the point. The point is that I am very drawn to not only look to myself for all of the answers (that's only one layer of the sin), but to obsess about all the things that are affecting me, me, me. I've been battling discouragement a lot lately in all sorts of ways. One day I'll be frustrated about my sugars, the next I feel like I don't have any friends and am not doing enough to attract people to myself. After that I'll be annoyed with how I handled something with my kids or my husband. I'll start making charts, graphs, lists -whatever it takes- to organize the craziness and all the while I'll forget to utter one prayer asking for help. At times I buy into the lie that I have the answers and can save myself (even in these little, daily disturbances) and I remain discouraged.

There is no better path to discouragement than to look within ourselves. Instead we are to look to our Savior.

But thanks be to God, who gives us the victory in Christ Jesus! We don't have to stay in that place! Pray without ceasing! Pray about everything! Not in a formal, disconnected way, and not just for smooth Costco trips, but with a posture that says, "Father, I need you for everything. I need you for big things and small things. In fact, I can't do anything by myself or for myself, but You promised that I can do all things through You. Give me a desire to connect with You about everything, Lord." Perhaps this is what it is to truly commune with the Lord constantly. Start praying about your shopping trips. Start praying about your kids. Start praying about your health. Start praying about your crappy attitude. Even if it is a one-sentence-on-the-go type of prayer. Start believing He wants to hear about it!

Instead we are to look to our Savior.

The Lord speaks in such funny ways sometimes. He can even use computer glitches to get his point across. I'm so thankful he reminded me of his truth over and over again and today I hope to look to my Savior all day long.

Pregnant lady with all the kids strikes again

This time one of the workers gave us bakery hats. The girls loved it and actually kept them on for a while - especially Ya! See how they're all squeezed in there? What are we going to do when brother comes??? :)

Baby Brother

Well, baby brother is 24 weeks along and not wanting to cooperate for any pictures. In most of the shots he has his hands in front of his face, so this is actually the best one. Isn't he sweet? I love him. The good thing is he's measuring 50th percentile in weight, which is average and not yet huge. The bad thing is they've been wearing me out with appointments. Today was a blessing though, when the doctor wanted to see me in 2 weeks rather than 1. Thank you, Lord! I'll take it! Please pray that my sugars get better, that I'm disciplined with my eating, that I change the rates in my pump when they need to be changed, and that I stay aggressive with it. I am feeling very discouraged by it all lately. It is just so constant and it will only get harder as the baby gets bigger. It feels like I am never doing anything right, which is a heavy weight to bear. Quite honestly, even if I was doing everything perfectly, it would be tough to keep up with, so I think the only way it will get better (i.e. where the OB's want it to be) is through prayer. So please say a prayer for me and baby brother today!